The Mavens last post came with predictions about the 2013-14 Team Maryland Hockey season and to date, the realities are exceeding expectations.
From parents to players to coaching staff this is ONE cohesive group and it’s shaping up to be a memorable year. Oh, and the team is doing pretty well to boot.
Take this past weekend for example:
Our team is slated to play the NJ Devils. The drive, well, let’s face it, any drive involving the NJ Turnpike will suck. All Her life the following has perplexed The Maven: Given a 65 mph speed limit on a 122 mile road, one should theoretically spend no more than 1.87 hours on the State’s highway. But it NEVER turns out that way. That road defines the vehicular travelers’ purgatory. Anyhoo, it’s clear from the get-go that a Tailgate is an imperative after such a campaign.
Miller Mom arrives early and stakes out what seems the perfect site for assembly. The unfrequented, sunny roof-top floor of the parking garage. She sends out an eblast and within minutes the cavalcade wends their way up. The Par-Tay is in full swing when The Mave is aware of Her ringing cell phone. A quick glance and its clear this is a call from way up in our organization. This is usually a call to let us know that a player has forgotten a critical item or another important player-related matter. Not today. This is a call to inform the Tailgaters that a Jersey Police patrol car has been spotted heading our way.
(THIS is the RARE organization where EVERYONE has your back)
The Mave sounds the alarm and within seconds all bottles are deftly decanted into our cache of Grandé Starbucks Cups…with lids. The transformation from Tailgater to Teetotaler fully complete before the squad car arrives. Yup…this group is guuuuude. Crisis averted and all beverages continue to be enjoyed (in plain view of the idling squad car) until Game Time.
After a slow start the boys ended it 8-3. Time to check into the hotel and get some grub. Everything is close to the rink, but it’s NJ, and here, if you need to turn left – you must first turn right…utilizing what the locals call: the “Jug-Handle.” (Garden State Logic) So, rule of thumb – a 5 minute drive takes 10. Furthermore: Should you require Petrol whilst in NJ – beware - you may not pump your own. The citizens of NJ believe such a complex task can be entrusted only to specially trained professionals. So, queue-up, do not exit your car and finally, wait your turn. (…more Garden State Logic) Add another 15 minutes.
The evening is spent with the parents and coaches corralled in the Courtyard Marriott Lounge area. Absolut Mom shows up with a bottle of Fireball Whiskey and immediately pours nearly everyone seated a generous share. Not typically inclined toward whiskey, The Mave takes a careful sip and O…..M…….G! Listen-up folks: when it comes to spirits – NEVER DOUBT THE ABSOLUT MOM. That woman has a PhD in potations.
Sunday brings game 2 against the Devils. Our boys are looking okay, not stellar. Heading into the 3rd period we’re up 4-1. And then the Devils start to pour it on….just as our boys take the foot off the gas. With minutes remaining the Devils have managed to answer all our goals and we find ourselves tied 4-4. Well, you’da thought Lord Frederick Frickin’ Stanley had showed up wearing a NJ Devils uniform. By games end, their crowd is in a drunken fervor and is screaming and laughing so loud The Mave was sure the Nitrous tank must have gone off in their section. Well, screw the score board, the Devils and their fans are strutting around West Orange looking like the cat that ate the canary…but, WAIT, we ended in a tie…right? And as for us? We’re moping around like we LOST!!! So HOW THE HELL does this work? Only one answer: More of that G-d Damn Garden State Logic!!!
WHAT-EVER!Our team comes home, ready and happy to continue playing on a team with all their friends, and the Parents? Well, we’re just glad to be back together in MD, planning our next travel weekend.